Sunday, November 9, 2014

If spam were real

What if all the spam the Complete and Total Loser got were true?

It would mean:
  • A pedophile just moved into the Loser's neighborhood
  • The Loser's credit report has just been accessed
  • Eight horny girls want to have sex with the Loser
  • A Canadian pharmacy will charge the Loser $2 per pill for Viagra
  • Fourteen women in a community of swingers desire the Loser join them
  • A government check is waiting for the Loser
  • The Loser can learn to F*CK LIKE A PORN STAR!!
  • The Loser's arrest record has just been accessed
  • A horny housewife who lives one mile away is eager to have sex with the Loser
    man woman money
  • A barrister from Damascus, Syria, wishes to give the Loser several million dollars because the Loser shares the same surname as the barrister's client, who has died
  • There are a number of credit cards with very low interest rates and $2,500 worth of credit on them waiting for the Loser to activate
  • For $15 a month, the Loser can get $250,000 worth of life insurance
  • If the Loser responds in time, he can get a free bottle of a safe, natural substance that will enable him to shed pounds without ever dieting again
  • For a low price, the Loser can attain an advanced degree by studying online at his own pace
  • A woman named Natalie has eight new pictures to share with the Loser
  • The Loser can grow his hair back and thereby look and feel younger
  • The Loser can peruse a popular dating site for a weekend at no cost 
  • huge breasts beach

No comments:

Post a Comment