Saturday, August 29, 2015

Party time

Woman photographing three women

The Complete and Total Loser went to his brother's house last week to have dinner with his family. Here, his sister-in-law is taking a picture of her daughter, who's sitting in between two friends, while his brother and nephew stare at their telephones. 
The Loser never had a wife or children and he wonders what it would be like to be a part of a scene like this. He is, however, taking care of the dog at the bottom of the photograph for a week.

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Why he shot them

The Complete and Total Loser is a failed journalist. He was the butt of jokes in the newsroom he worked in and although his leaving was by choice, he's certain most of his coworkers were glad to see him go. 
With that personal history, which was over a decade ago, the Loser understands the rage Vester Lee Flanagan II may have felt at his failure to succeed in what is likely the only job he ever enjoyed. But of course, nothing—ill treatment, unfair termination, outright humiliation—justifies murdering people. 
Alison Parker and Adam Ward

Your occupation is not everything. It pays your bills and for a very lucky few it allows a life of luxury and financial ease. But it is not who you are, it does not define you, it doesn't matter that much. It's just a job. The victims, Alison Parker and Adam Ward, will be remembered as good people first, competent workers second. Flanagan will be remembered only as an angry, mean, nut.  

Saturday, August 22, 2015


The Complete and Total Loser has no need for any medical equipment, yet when he's left alone in his doctor's examination room during his annual physical he's tempted to look for things to steal, though he doubts there's much available beyond alcohol pads and tongue depressors. 
He was very tempted to open the Gyn Supplies drawer seen here just to see what was inside, but he refrained. 
examination table
What's in the Gyn Supplies drawer of this examination table? The Loser will never know.

Sunday, August 16, 2015

Nuclear energy

cooling towers at Limerick, Pa. nuclear power plant
The cooling towers at the Limerick, Pa. nuclear power plant give off an odd steam cloud.
The Complete and Total Loser is old enough to remember a time when nuclear energy held great promise. "Energy too cheap to meter," they said. "A safe way to provide power to everyone," they said. Then came Three Mile Island in 1979, the partial meltdown thanks to a stuck valve and badly trained operators. Coolant was released, along with some radioactive material. Not helping things was the release of the popular movie, The China Syndrome, twelve days before the accident. No one was hurt, but the industry was badly shaken, and growth in the industry slowed markedly. 
jane fonda and jack lemmon in the china syndrome
Jane Fonda and Jack Lemmon in The China Syndrome.

And this was years before Chernobyl disaster of 1986 which killed 31 people outright. The ultimate number of those whose lives were or will be greatly shortened by it is hard to estimate, but the accident released four hundred times more radioactive material than the nuclear bomb detonated over Hiroshima.
The Loser once heard an expert say a basic flaw with nuclear energy is that technology of the late 1950s is being used to harness a mid-21st century form of power. 
Global warming is making many rethink nuclear energy because of it's lack of carbon emissions. Ultimately, however, the problem of what to do with the waste remains an insurmountable problem.

Saturday, August 15, 2015

Feck you

US one dollar bills
Symbols for U.S. reserve banks can spell out a few words if properly arranged.

This is how bored the Complete and Total Loser, who has no idea how to begin a conversation with strangers, gets in bars.

Sunday, August 9, 2015

Proof of age

Not that he needs it, but the delight the Complete and Total Loser takes in seeing hummingbirds is proof that he is the oldest man under sixty he knows.
hummingbird at hummingbird feeder
A hummingbird approaches a hummingbird feeder. Look at the adorable little feet! Aww ...

Friday, August 7, 2015

When he was born

A gorilla.
Little of interest happened on May 19, 1958, the day the Complete and Total Loser was born. In fact, the story about the "football men" is about it:

may 20 1958 new york times article about gorilla wrestling
A May 20, 1958, New York Times article about gorilla wrestling.

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Who shows up

The Complete and Total Loser is an uninteresting looking white male, age 57, who has a graduate degree and is conservative and almost effete in his dating habits. 
Why, he wonders, does this woman keep showing up in the list of women he might like in his OK Cupid dating profile? It baffles and amuses the Loser.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

The American way to eat

"Less talk, more eat, no human interaction required, order food now."
I rest my case.
grub hub ad

Monday, August 3, 2015

The old friend

doe and two fawns in suburban back yard
The majority of conversations the Complete and Total Loser has these days are with animals in his back yard.

The Complete and Total Loser got an email today from a friend he's fallen a little out of touch with. She suggested that the Loser go into the city and have dinner with her husband and her, or that they travel to the suburbs to visit the Loser. At this time, however, the Loser can't imagine why anyone would want to see him, or why he'd want to see anyone else.

Friday, July 31, 2015

The big city

girl in city fountain
A girl cools off in a city fountain.

Today, the Complete and Total Loser went into the city by train. It was a nice day; hot but the humidity was low. He met up with a friend and they ate gyros together. Then they had coffee. After that, they met up with other friends the Loser hadn't seen for awhile. They walked around some more. Then the Loser said goodbye to his friend and took a train home. 
The Loser had a nice day. 

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Seven [great] reasons to love Trump

Donald Trump
Donald Trump

  1. The press hates him so the pictures they'll publish will be ones in which he looks funny
  2. He'll fund his campaign himself, which will show everyone what someone like him would really do if elected
  3. Once he's sure of something, like birtherism, he just won't let it go
  4. His extreme views could energize a new era of activism
  5. Melania Knauss, his current wife, will provide both men and women with a useful distraction during boring events and speeches
  6. He wants Sarah Palin in his cabinet and will probably make many other entertaining decisions
  7. All those movies about a future in which an evil, dictatorial president gets elected will have more credibility

Melania Knauss Trump
Melania Knauss Trump

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Look at him go!

Today, the Complete and Total Loser's blog, this thing you are looking at now, hit 21,000 views. Yes, that's impressive. Or it would be if the Loser's blog hasn't been active for six years, six months and seven days, including today. That means that during the 2,379 days the Loser has been keeping this up, he's had an average of 8.82723834 hits per day and that on average each post has been viewed by 35.9589041 people!
number of page views graphic Complete and Total Loser blog

Thursday, July 23, 2015

My Netflix girl

Netflix's log-in page has been using the image here for an unusually long time. The Complete and Total Loser thinks the girl in it looks a little like Heather Graham, the actress, but Heather Graham if she had teeth like real people. The Loser likes Heather Graham so it doesn't bother him. 
Heather Graham
Heather Graham

What does bother him a little is a closer look at this photo. The girl is sitting on a nice couch in a nice room. The houseplants are healthy, there's a wholesome beverage and snacks on the table. The walls are made of wood, not wood paneling. She's wearing comfortable clothes that suggest an environment with a moderate temperature. She is possibly barefoot. 
She is, however, alone, watching a movie on a tiny screen. True, she might be watching a half-hour television show. That would make more sense. But still, does anyone really watch such things at home on a screen they're holding in their hands? If you're on a train or in a waiting room of some kind, yes. But in your house or apartment? 
Are we to learn from this that Netflix can assuage the agony of being alone, left on the shelf because although you look a little like Heather Graham you're not quite her and have been rejected because of it?
netflix log-in page woman on couch
A female Netflix subscriber watches a show or movie on a handheld device while sitting on a couch.

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Stop smoking!

Why, oh why, would anyone smoke these days? The Complete and Total Loser can understand it if you're over 40, but surely anyone younger than that grew up in an age when smoking was so restricted and expensive that they didn't get thoroughly hooked on it.  
Or not. The Loser has a friend who is 36 and smokes heavily, even now, just under a year after his mother died of lung cancer at the age of 58. 
seated woman traveler smoking
A woman smokes a cigarette outside Philadelphia's 30th Street Train Station.