The simplest job advice

1. Ask yourself what you'd be doing for a living if you could wake up tomorrow and be doing it.
2. Write down what you have to do in order to get that job.
3. Write down what the obstacles to doing it are and rate them on a possibility scale of one to ten.
4. If the average is over five, look into surmounting those obstacles. If it's under five, think about a second choice and repeat steps 2-4.

If you can't do step one, write down the jobs you've had in the past and the things you did in that job. Circle all the things you liked and put them in a column. Look at that list and think of what kind of job they point to. It may be something you hadn't thought of and you might be surprised by what it is. Once you have something, to steps 2-3.

If, like the Complete and Total Loser, you're too old and tired and have only a history of failure behind you, ignore the advice above.

Good luck!

The Loser would have liked being an artist but has no talent.