Thursday, February 24, 2011

The Loser and his Parents' Will

They know, the Complete and Total Loser's parents, that their ends are near. The Loser's father has made a point of telling him where important documents are stored. Things crop up in conversations and it's no longer with the jocular air it used to be ("Ten years from now! Ho! Ho! I'll be dead!") and they're resigned to their canes and walkers.
Two weeks ago, in one of the conversations with his father, he mentioned that the will divided up their money among the Loser and his two older brothers equally, but that the understanding was that they'd mete it out to the Loser in portions as his life continued.
light cigar with money
That's right. They want the Loser's brothers to remind him for the rest of his life that he is, indeed, a loser who, even though over 50, cannot be trusted to behave as an adult with a largish sum of money. 
The Loser let this get under his skin for a week, then blew up at both parents. He made it clear that they should divide whatever they have equally among the three sons and realize that the Loser will neither ask for nor accept money from either of them. The Loser further noted that he has lived well without a handout since shortly after graduating college when, admittedly, he had some trouble getting a job that paid him enough to pay his rent for a year or so. 

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