Friday, April 27, 2012

Children's Letters to the Loser #3

Dear Complete and Total Loser,
I am a boy and I have two little sisters who bug me all the time. If I hit them my mom and dad get mad but if I don't hit them they bug me even more. What should I do?
Zachary, age 11

Dear Zachary,
Do not hit your sisters. You are bigger and stronger than they are and will usually be so as you grow up. That makes hitting girls and women always an unfair fight, which is the mark of a coward. The greatest defense you'll ever have is your ability to think and express yourself. Learn to reason with your sisters instead of using brute force. Try saying something like, "If you leave me alone until I finish my homework, I'll show you how to play a cool game I just got." Besides the matter of fairness, your self interest is involved here. Before long, your sisters will bring home friends. Girls. You never know if one of these girls may be someone you'll have an interest in, so the more highly they think of you the better, and guess who will be telling them about you?
Your friend,
The Complete and Total Loser
Edgar Degas's Spartan Girls Challenging Boys

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