Skepticism is funny. More of it often comes with age, and people who've been around for awhile can detect scams and bad reasoning with greater ease than the young. At times, their skepticism increases as if with momentum and many stop believing anything. Then there are others believe too much and eagerly forward email with crackpot ideas about microwave ovens and untrue stories about heroic dogs and cats.
Some people used to believe everything and then stop believing anything. The opposite is also true.
The Complete and Total Loser, who used to believe everything (ESP, astrology, acupuncture, reincarnation, levitation, UFOs) thinks he may be in a sweet spot now, in his mid 50s. He doesn't fall for much and he investigates anything that sounds even slightly suspicious.
That doesn't apply to this Craigslist employment ad: One look at it and you know that whoever signs up for it is in for nothing but trouble. Late payment if any, offices that are impossible to reach, likely because they're located in another country. And consider the premise: A company asking you to lie.
This ad shows you why you can't trust reviews you read on the Internet.
There are times when events seem to happen back-to-back with greater speed than chance would predict. At those times, many try to assign order. Most look to the paranormal. Others, conspiracies that verge on paranoia.
The Complete and Total Loser takes the events in and sees them all as random happenings in a large universe.
Last night, while watching an old British comedy (The Good Life) he hadn't seen since the early '80s, he heard a forgotten line that was a favorite of a woman the Loser was close to: "Don't trip over the mountains. Don't trip over the mountains". He hadn't thought of that line since she talked about it in the late 80s. It surprised him to remember it all these years later. The woman died in '02.
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| Mr. Miller |
This morning, the Loser found that his trap finally worked and he caught the very smart raccoon that's been living in his attic. He released it in a nice place, but still feels a little bad about it. The animal looked depressed and embarrassed. When he opened the trap's door, it ran faster than the Loser thought a raccoon could run.
Reading the paper when he got home, he found the obituary of a favorite high school English teacher. If you've ever read a decent sentence by the Loser, thank Mr. Miller.
