Sunday, June 12, 2011

Eight Views in One Day

As unworthy of attention and love as he is, the Complete and Total Loser hasn't lost his instinctive want for attention so, as sad a thing as this is, he checks his blog statistics every day or two to see whether anyone's looked at it.
Yesterday, eight people did. The only statistic this site seems to indicate is that someone, possibly from India, viewed a page that had the word "sex" in the title.
Still. This shatters The Loser's record by 600 percent.
In the 874 days since he began this blog, eagerly posting daily, waiting for feedback, advice or at least commiseration, just 348 people have viewed The Loser's pages. And viewed doesn't mean read, of course. (Not that he expects anyone to; there is nothing of value here.)
The Loser is flummoxed by this new uptick. His only explanation is a scenario The Loser dimly remembers from "On the Beach," the 1957 post-nuclear apocalypse novel The Loser knows from the 1959 Stanley Kramer film, in which an overturned soda bottle is pulled by a window shade loose in the wind on and off a telegraph key, sending a random signal from Seattle, bringing a submarine crew there in search of survivors. 
Somewhere a cat on a keyboard hit the right succession of keys to access The Loser's posts. 
If only the cat would comment ...
cat green eyes


  1. Don.t be actually reading,following and now commenting your post...and btw,im from romania

  2. Thank you very much for your kind comment and attention. By the way, I have a coworker from Romania. Many Americans think Romania is much like Russia and it's sometimes portrayed that way. Not true, I've learned; it's more like sophisticated parts of Europe. My friend fled in 1989 with her family when she was a young girl and has lived on the East Coast ever since, though she has been back for visits several times.

  3. Thats sweet...i wanna come to america too but i.m too young T.T and yeah...romania is somewhat a communist country, we still have more to do though it.s been 22 years since we are a "democratic republic" uh, anywayz, no need to bore you more gone. oh,and youre welcome!

  4. I've had about five comments here in the entire life of this blog, so don't think any comment you make is uninteresting to me. Always remember that the image you have of a country from afar is very different from that country's reality. America's a great country if you're in the top 2 percent of the wealth holders. When you're closer to the middle, which is the majority, it's not so great.