Mens' reasons

In 2008, US strip clubs brought in an estimated $2 billion, with over 300,000 women employed at around 3,000 clubs. By 2010, the number of clubs had grown to an estimated 4,000.

The Complete and Total Loser has never been to one, but he can see their appeal. Or his version of it. Look at this girl he saw on YouTube. Her name is Katee Owens. Her breasts are DDD in size, and natural. The Loser dislikes large breasts, but he can't stop looking at this girl, here dancing to "Radar Love." Why? Because she's smiling as if she likes whomever is looking at her, in this case the Loser, and her smile looks real. No woman has ever smiled like that at the Loser, ever, not even once.  

Children's Letters to the Loser #23

Dear Complete and Total Loser,

I am 14 and a Christian. My parents won't let me go to and of the year school dance because they say it will lead to bad things. I understand and respect their feelings, but it does seem old fashioned to me and other kids my age from my church are allowed to go. What can I tell them?

Luke

Dear Luke,

Your parents should allow you to go. While there is nearly always a sexual component to dancing, it can be a wholesome way to express yourself physically. Physical expression is something we all do all the time and is called, simply, "body language." Unfortunately, many have given dance a bad name by overdoing it. There are six-year-olds who "grind" on dance floors in imitation of what they've seen on television and the internet. I assume that the party will be supervised by adults. You should discuss your reasons for wanting to attend the dance with your parents. If you can convince them that you're not just out there to shake your stuff, they may acquiesce. But be warned; adults often see sexual motives in youths where none exist. 

Party on,

The Complete and Total Loser

Young people dance to rock music in the 60s. Photo by Robert Garro.